FY Center Stage: Save the Earth
by Draconsis
Summary: A play meant for Earth day 2002. What happens if miaka is assigned to correct a family of their ungreen ways?


Earth Day 2002 - Save the Earth 

A play by Draconsis

**Cast list:**

Narrator

Miaka as the Green Fairy

Nuriko as Son #1

Taiitsukun as Grandma

Tomo as Rag and Bone man

Nakago as Father

Suboshi as the Maid

Soi as the Wife

Hotohori as Son #2

Chichiri as the Architect

Ashitare as the family dog

**Narrator: **

Welcome to a typical day in the Suzaku household, though they seem to have a visitor today. This is Miaka the Green Fairy, and she has been sent by the God of Environmental Conservation as part of her internship with the department. 

**Miaka (Green Fairy):**  

(_sounding very hyper_) Hello! I'm the Green Fairy, but you can call me Miaka. 

(_looks downcast_) Sigh, the boss sent me down to correct this family of their ungreen ways. I heard from all my seniors Taikiko and Suzuno that this is one family with a horrible track record.  

(_suddenly perks up_) But if I pass, I'll graduate! And I won't have to work under the boss anymore! Ha! If anyone can do it, I can do it! ^_^V 

(_skips away_)

SCENE ONE: Nuriko's room 

**Narrator:**

The eldest daughter in the family, Nuriko, is doing homework in his room and he doesn't seem to be in a good mood…

**Nuriko:**

(_Scribbles on pieces of paper one after another, and crumples and throws one away after another behind his back._)

(_Everything pauses and Miaka appears. She looks at Nuriko and shakes her head._)

**Miaka (Green Fairy)**: 

This is very bad, very, very bad! Wasting so much paper! Do you know that it is because of these sort of people that deforestation has gotten so serious? Do you know that because of deforestation, we are seeing lots of animals and plants becoming extinct and endangered? Do you know that some of these animals and plants might actually hold the answer to some of our medical problems now? Do you know that Tama-neko's could be extinct by 2050? Do you know that Mitsukake will murder you once he finds out all those cures have been destroyed?! 

(_She sighs_) You (_points to Nuriko_) should learn to save paper. You should write on both sides of the paper and when you have done so, don't throw it away, recycle it! (_Waggles finger_) Mou, try again.

(_Miaka walks away shaking her head, everything unfreezes_)

**Nuriko: **

(_Writes on both sides of the paper before putting it in the box labelled "recycle" and repeats the process a few times before throwing down pen_.)

Aiya! Why must we do homework? Why is Geography so boring? Why must Mr Lim give so many assignments? All his fault! Make me waste so much paper! Hmph! Don't care already, tomorrow go school and copy!  

 (_Gets up and leaves_)

*A/n: Aiya translates from hokkien roughly as sheesh. Mr Lim is my geography teacher. The very bad grammatical structure is characteristic of Singlish, or Singapore English. Yes, it's not proper. But it sounds nice this way! ^_^.

**SCENE TWO: Still in Nuriko's room.**

**Narrator:**  

So Nuriko decides to take a break, and give up on his homework.

**Nuriko:**

(_Walks around the room. He turns on the computer, radio, air conditioning, fan and television and sits down to read a book. Taiitsukun his grandmother walks past and shakes her head._)

**Taiitsukun (Grandma):**

(_Slaps face_) Nuriko! Be good, listen to grandma, don't on everything at the same time. Wasting electricity! You know, a long, long time ago, when Grandma was still in China, we had no money, no food, nothing at all! We had to work so hard and were so skinny. Yet here, you are, so fat already still don't go and exercise. You know-

(_Is cut off_)

**Nuriko:**

Grandma! I know, I know! Go and sleep ok? Don't come and disturb me! AND I AM NOT FAT!!!!!!!!!!

**Taiitsukun (Grandma):**

How can you- (_cut off_)

(_Everything freezes and Miaka appears_)

**Miaka (Green Fairy):**

This is ridiculous! Switching on all the electrical appliances at the same time? The air con! Oh my seikun, the CFCs! The poor, poor ozone layer! And Seiryu's palace! And the seikun's health!

(_Sniffs_) Computer, radio and television and he can still read? Didn't they teach him in seishi school to concentrate on one thing at time? And the fan and air con? I know Japan is warm during summer but it isn't that bad! But of course the fan would be a better choice. Plus, she's so rude to his grandmother. 

(_Waggles finger_)Mou, try again.

(_Miaka walks away shaking her head, everything unfreezes_)

**Nuriko:**

Sorry grandma. I'll switch them off. 

(_Switches them off while Taiitsukun looks on with a pleased look on her face_) Grandma, let's go and have some Nuriko specials. Then you can tell me stories of your life in China. 

(_Gives Ah Ma a sweet smile and leads her out of the room but not before giving the audience a pained look._)

SCENE 3: Living room 

**Narrator: **

The head of the family is reading the entire weeks' worth of newspapers in the living room as usual when someone comes knocking on his door.

(_Nakago is reading newspapers with a stack of them in front of him. The doorbell rings and someone knocks on the door_)

**Tomo (Rag and Bone man):**

Hello, anybody at home? Collecting newspapers!

**Nakago :**

No! Nobody at home! And we don't have any newspapers. 

(_As he says so, he picks up another newspaper_)

(_Everything freezes and Miaka appears_)

**Miaka (Green Fairy):**

Hey, old guy! Do you not call these newspapers? Why are you so stingy? Do you know that the Rag and Bone man pays you for your newspapers? Do you know you can earn a couple of cents from it? And he has a crush on you? Oh I forgot! You live in a 3-storey, 10,000 square feet bungalow in the middle of Bukit Timah! A few cents? Huh, loose change. I know you want to use the newspapers clean up your dog's faeces but I'm sure you don't need a whole stack right? Ashitare can also use the toilet bowl!

(_Waggles finger._)Mou, try again.

*A/N: Bukit Timah is a very up market place in Singapore. Only the rich can afford to live there. And since I don't know any of those sort of places in Japan…^_^;;; And I'm not sure if other countries have them, but the rag and bone man goes around collecting old stuff for recycling, such as newspapers, and then weighs them, and gives you a few cents depending on the weight.

(_Miaka walks away shaking her head, everything unfreezes_)

**Nakago:**

(_Gets up and carries the entire stack of newspapers to the door and opens it_)

 Hey! Mr weirdo! I've some newspapers for you! 

 (_Drops the entire stack into his arms_)

Bye-bye! Don't need to pay me. Go and have a cup of coffee! And git!

(_Slams door in Tomo's face_)

**Tomo (Rag and Bone man):**

(_Staggers off with hearts in his eyes_) He spoke to me! Nakiepoo spoke to me!

SCENE 4: Front of house 

**Narrator**: 

The maid, Suboshi, is washing the car with a running hose in the garden.

_*A/N: Imagine Suboshi with a little white frilly apron…_

(_Suboshi splashes the water everywhere_)

**Suboshi: **

Why this bird-shit so hard to splash off? Madam said I have to cook so I cannot use my ryuuseisui to scratch it off. Otherwise it will have germs and when I cook I will contaminate the food and the whole family will have food-poisoning and die. 

(_Evil laugh_)Not that I mind of course.

(_Mother shouts from backstage_)

**Soi: **

Suboshi! Come and wash the toilet! Then go and sterilize your hands before you cook! Otherwise we'll get food poisoning! Hurry up!

**Suboshi: **

(_annoyed voice_)Yes, madam.

(_Throws the hose down while it is still running and dashes towards the house_)

(_Everything freezes and Miaka appears_)

**Miaka (Green Fairy): **

Oh my goodness! What kind of employer is that? Treating the maid like some slave and worst of all, she did not teach him to turn off the hose after use! Water is precious you know! And goodness, washing the car with a hose actually wastes much more water than the good old sponge and bucket of water! Oh dear, I sure hope this maid won't turn out to be like the other family's one. She actually used pure, drinking water when there was water rationing to make a bubble bath! That was totally atrocious! 

(_Waggles finger_) Mou, try again.

*A/N: 'The other family' refers to another skit my class put up where the maid used pure, drinking water when there was water rationing to make a bubble bath. 

(_Miaka walks away shaking her head, everything unfreezes_)

(_Suboshi runs back and turns off the hose_)

**Suboshi: **

Oh no! I nearly forgot to turn off the hose! Phew! Thank goodness. Otherwise madam will deduct my pay again.

SCENE 5: Outside the bath room 

**Narrator: **

One of the more interesting sights in the Suzaku household. People fighting over the use of the single bathroom, in the three-storey, 10,000 sq ft bungalow in the middle of Bukit Timah. The architect forgot to add in more toilets.

**(Person):**

(_Runs across stage holding a piece of paper with Chichiri on it. Holding a blueprint with a BIG arrow pointing towards him saying architect_.)

**Nuriko:**

(_Runs in and bangs on the toilet door_)

 Hey! Hotohori! Get out now! I need to use the toilet! You've been inside for two hours already!

**Hotohori: **

Ok, five more minutes.

**(Person):**

(_Holds up card: fifteen minutes later_)

**Nuriko:**

(_Jumping up and down and banging on the door_)

Get out now! Or I'll knock down the door!

**Hotohori:**

Ok, one more minute.

**(Person):**

(_Holds up card: Thirty minutes later_)

**Nuriko:**

(_Is crumbled at the entrance of the toilet_)

(_Weakly_) Get out now…

**Hotohori:**

Ok, wait awhile. I'm washing my hair, very fast.

(_Everything freezes and Miaka appears_)

**Miaka (Green Fairy): **

This is getting sickening! Which soul in the right frame of their mind would spend two and three quarter hours in the toilet? And he's still washing her hair? Even if his hair survives, his skin might not! 

**Hotohori:**

**(**_Face turns green._)

**Miaka (Green Fairy):**

It will just become wrinkly just like his Grandmother's! 

**Hotohori:**

**(**_Face turns even greener._)

**Miaka (Green Fairy):**

Water is for more worthwhile uses then spending two and three quarter hours worth of water on bathing alone! Save water! Don't spend so much time bathing!  

(_Waggles finger_) Mou, try again.

(_Miaka walks away shaking her head, everything unfreezes_)

**Nuriko:**

(_Gets up but before he can bang the door…_)

**Hotohori:**

(_Runs out of the toilet with a look of panic on his face._)

MY SKIN MY SKIN!!!!!!!!! Next time I'm not listening to mummy when she says to bathe until you get all the germs off. Even though we must be clean, and totally germ-free, otherwise we'll fall sick.

(_Looks into little handheld mirror_)  OH MY GOD! Is _that_ a wrinkle!?

**Nuriko:**

(_Looks at him with a pained look before running into the toilet_)

SCENE 6: Dinner table 

**Narrator: **

So now the family's sitting around the table eating their dinner, cooked by a totally germ-free, yea right, Suboshi.

**Nakago: **

Let's go watch TV now, shall we? The documentary of 18th century torture chambers is on.

**Everyone except Soi:**

(_Everyone shouts yes and troop off, leaving Soi to clear up_)

**Soi: **

So much food left and so messy! What to do? Tsk, just throw away!

(_Throws everything into a plastic bag and about to throw it into the dustbin_)

(_Everything freezes and Miaka appears_)

**Miaka (Green Fairy):**

Sniff. This is hopeless! This family is really the pits! Throwing away food? How many people are starving in Africa, Kuto and other parts of the world? You can actually wrap the food up and store it in the fridge and when you need it, just heat it up! It's that simple! Why throw away perfectly edible food? 

(_Waggles finger_) Mou, try again.

(_Miaka walks away shaking her head, everything unfreezes_)

**Soi:**

(_Stops what she's doing, looks at the plastic bag again and frowns_)

Hmmm… It'll be a waste to throw away the food just like that. Lobster and caviar too! I know! I'll keep the lobster and caviar for supper, and as for the chicken, fish and others, I'll feed it to Ashitare!

(_Walks out of the room_)

SCENE 7: Living room 

**Narrator: **

The family is in the living room and are watching their favourite anime when Hotohori starts to sneeze uncontrollably.

**Hotohori:**

Achoo!

**Taiitsukun(Grandma): **

Bless you! 

**Hotohori:**

AHHHHHHHHCHOO!

**Nuriko:**

Bless you! 

**Hotohori:**

AHCHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

**Nakago:**

Blast you! That was the part where I nearly took over the world.

**Nuriko:**

See? It's your fault for staying in the toilet for so long! Now you have a cold! Serves you right! HA!

**Miaka (Green Fairy):**

(_Appears in the scene, tiptoeing._)

**Hotohori:**

(_Blows his nose very hard on tissue paper, carefully folding it up until there is only a very small piece_)

See grandma? I know how to save paper! 

**Taiitsukun (Grandmother): **

Good boy- (_gets cut off_)

**Hotohori: **

I've got an even better idea! I can unfold the tissue and hang it up to dry, and then I can use it again!

**Everyone: **

YUCK!

(_Everything freezes_)

**Miaka (Green Fairy):**

No! No! No! It wasn't supposed to be like this! I thought you had learnt your lesson! I thought you understood! I thought you were intelligent seishi! You can save paper but not in this way! If anyone of you falls sick because of this, it's not my fault. I _give_ up!

(_Sinks to the floor with a strand of hair popping out_)

SCENE 7: Grandma

**Taiitsukun (Grandmother): **

Sigh. I hope all my descendants have learnt form this. The Earth belongs to us and our future generations. It'll be a sad sight if they cannot enjoy the Earth in its most beautiful state, because of our deeds. Natural resources are there for us to use, courtesy of Me, but we have to learn to use them wisely and carefully. Once these resources are used up, the earth will be one big barren piece of land and for all the power of humans, seishi and seikun, we can do nothing when that time comes.     


End file.
